Where did Infiniti come up with the their amazing naming system? If you see my previous post, I do think there is a beauty and simplicity to Mazda’s naming, and more European car makers do at least use some progression to their numbers – as the number increases, so does the size or the horsepower. So, Infiniti, where does the “X” come from? And the “35”? And, while you’re at it, what ingenious marketing agency came up with that amazing name, Infiniti?

OK – enough about them, now about you, TT. Maybe you should be driving an Audi TT? Oh, right, you basically are in your sporty SUV that handles. Roger that. But if you do ever switch over, bring your plates. We’ll just start calling you X35.

OK, so to make this one work, you’ve got to accept the fact that the driver’s name is Maine. I think that works. Given names these days, I’ll bet he’s got a friend named Saskatchewan.

But there’s actually something I like here. I know – you can’t believe it. The crabby Bozo likes a plate after all. Here goes: I like that the entire car name is just “3” – can’t beat that. And it’s not even a lame single dig.

I’ve been at this too long – I’m getting worn down.

Power to the Northeast!

HK – psst! Over here! Behind your rig! Hanging out by the shiny silver characters on your Benz that say, to me at least, R 500. So here’s the problem, see. Your plate says C 500. HK – or should I call you Heather? – what’s up? Are these little letters too confusing? I agree – what’s the R for when it should be a C for ‘chariot’ right? I’m with you on this one. So how about maybe getting a silvery C for up there on the left, too?

Or did you think you’d fool us into thinking this minivan is a coupe? Was that it? It’s so sleek and all and we’re so dazzled by that peace-sign-you-call-a-benz-symbol that we’d overlook the two sliding doors and seating for 26?

Minivan = R, right?

Think maybe Roz was a steno clerk back in the day? Nah. More like a Martha Stewart, if you ask me.

I’m seeing Roz as, let’s just say, matronly. Yes, it’s only a 350 (which I guess means it’s an E) but that’s plenty to haul Roz around from the scrapbooking store to the rotary club to the tennis luncheon. From there, she’ll visit the florist for some arrangements and a glass of chardonnay, and then she’ll get home in time for her guided meditation with Hans. She has to be sure to leave home before the nanny arrives with the kids – oh, the noise and disruption!

We all know what’s important in life: a Benz from a dealer in Santa Monica.